i guess not everyone realises the meaning of a blog.. to me, a blog is smthg which is quite private.. u discuss ur intimate feelings.. u share ur joys and woes with ur frens.. those who are concerned will read wad u haf to say.. cuz some things u juz cant express outrightly infront of ppl's faces.. also, a blog is sort of a diary. where u write down interesting events, which u wan to share wif ur frens.. so if u read my blog, u r sharing a part of my life.


done wif the rantings, i'm juz disappointed my own bf doesnt read my blog. =( but then, i've nv been a whiny.. he'll read if he wans to.. if he dun wans to, well, other ppl will read. rite my frens? =)


anyway, i was looking at my 1st webpage dat i had in 2003.. brought back so much memories.. i think i was cuter back then =S and more carefree. nv bothered abt getting a bf or wad. i juz enjoyed life and did wad i like to do.. i think i changed a lot.. i used to be more self-centered, always strongly opiniated, had the "if u like me u'll please me, if not, shoo off" kind of attitude. veri strong ego and pride too. but i did cherish my frens n family a lot.. mabe more den now. i guess i am starting to take ppl for granted again. bad habit.. and i used to be more sociable. joined more activities and made more frens. now.. i seldom talk to new ppl, let alone make new frens. of cuz, back den i was single =S plus i used to pray more back den. was a stronger believer in guanyin dat time..

and i put in a lot of effort in my blogs.. always tried to include themes in my monthly 'designs'.. searched for midis to put in the background.. tried to talk abt interesting issues so dat ppl will find reading my blog to be entertaining and interesting. now, i juz blog abt my daily life, which is often abt unhappy stuff. cuz i tend to write when i'm unhappy.. i think my blog's getting real dull rite? even my life's getting boring.. sometimes i cant stand it at all.. i will ask myself: "is this all to ur life? is dat all u've got? girl i'm sure u r not onli this!"


being in a r/s has its pros and cons.. pros i bet everyone will know. u feel loved, happy. but on the other hand, it makes u insecure, lose confident, and afraid of losing it. love makes u stronger and weaker both at the same time. how do u balance it? i dun think i will ever know.


anyway, if u r interested in looking thru my old writings.. and my photos (dat website is almost a summary of my whole life till 2004) from sch.. u can visit http://andra_the_sun.tripod.com
i even made my own banner to be used for linking me on ur website. haha..